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John: ( (father of the bride to be) talking to wife) Honey, I think it’s great Amanda is getting married to Nick. I think he’s a great guy, don’t you.
Mary: Oh yes, he’s a hunk… and brainy too. But you know what’s so great about this wedding hon?
John: I dunno, what?
Mary: They’re getting married in Jamaica! How romantic… and we’re all going.
John: Yes dear, and what’s even better is that Frank’s [Nick’s dad] paying for all of it. I wonder where he made all his money?
Mary: Amanda said something about him being in sanitation or something like that… they don’t talk about it much. But they say that he hates inefficiency. Something about some of his employees and business associates having been in tragic accidents...
John: Well... he said I should go ahead and book rooms at the Moko Beach; it’s supposed to be small and intimate, on a fantastic beach. I just saw a brochure today and I just can’t wait to feel the white sand between my toes, walking with you under the moonlight…
Mary: Honey, did you say small? Don’t forget that Ruth and her tribe are ALL coming, and they haven’t even seen Amanda since she was six years old. That’s six of them you know…and if I’m not mistaken she’s pregnant again.
John: She’s a freeloader if ever there was one, but what the hey? Frank approved the numbers so why worry? Sixteen of us, right? Eight adults and eight kids. right?
Mary: Right, Amanda and I figured it all out, our family will need about eight rooms in all. She’s done all the allocations but left the hotel choice to you. The list is over there by the phone.
John: I better call and make those reservations. We don’t want to have any screw ups for Amanda’s big day. [ dialing]It’s only a couple minutes from the RIU where Frank and his people are staying. Apparently, RIU’s arranging the entire thing, we just have to…hello? Moko Beach, Jamaica?
Reservation desk: Yes sir, this is Moko Beach, how can we be of service to you?
John: Well, my friend stayed at your hotel last year and raved about your hotel and its service. I’ve got a group coming in for a wedding and we wanted something fairly intimate. Exactly how many rooms do you have?
Reservation desk: Well Mr. ?
John: Maudib, Mr. Maudib
Reservation desk: Yes, we have exactly eighty rooms of which….
John: Perfect, we’ll take them all. For the 15th March next year… that’s still nine months away
Reservation desk: [incredulous] All of them sir? Are you sure? That’s high season sir, our rates then are $120US per night double occupancy…
John: Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll find my credit card can handle the deposit (covering the phone and whispering to Mary)[ especially since Frank’s paying]… look, I’m in a hurry so here’s my name, credit card number [John gives the rest of information]
Reservation desk: Ok sir, that’s all done. You’ll receive a confirmation by email. Look forward to being of service to you. (both hang up)
John: Well, that was easy, the hotel was the perfect size. Exactly EIGHT rooms. Let’s go to dinner.
NINE MONTHS LATER
The John and Mary clan arrive at the Moko Beach…
Mary: John, this looks a bit bigger than an eight room hotel.
John: It certainly does, but it does have a certain intimacy about it.
AT THE RESERVATION DESK
John: Your hotel certainly looks like it’s well equipped, for an eight room hotel.
Reservation desk (same one John spoke to 9 months before): Sir we are an EIGHTY room hotel, of which sir, 20 are actual bedrooms, 20 bathrooms, 20 sitting rooms and 20 kitchenettes.
John: So you mean, I’m booked into a 20 room hotel?
RD: Sir, We have eighty rooms of which…
John: Hello, who gives a heck about the number of bathrooms you have?!? How the hell am I going to explain to Frank.
Mary: Look on the bright side honey, the hotel could actually have had eighty rooms.
Nick and Amanda got married and lived happily ever after. John woke up one night and found the head of a dead chicken on his bed. An attached note said"if you wasn't family..." John and Mary moved to Florida far from their daughter's in-laws, where they now manage a 20 room Motel.
Mary: Oh yes, he’s a hunk… and brainy too. But you know what’s so great about this wedding hon?
John: I dunno, what?
Mary: They’re getting married in Jamaica! How romantic… and we’re all going.
John: Yes dear, and what’s even better is that Frank’s [Nick’s dad] paying for all of it. I wonder where he made all his money?
Mary: Amanda said something about him being in sanitation or something like that… they don’t talk about it much. But they say that he hates inefficiency. Something about some of his employees and business associates having been in tragic accidents...
John: Well... he said I should go ahead and book rooms at the Moko Beach; it’s supposed to be small and intimate, on a fantastic beach. I just saw a brochure today and I just can’t wait to feel the white sand between my toes, walking with you under the moonlight…
Mary: Honey, did you say small? Don’t forget that Ruth and her tribe are ALL coming, and they haven’t even seen Amanda since she was six years old. That’s six of them you know…and if I’m not mistaken she’s pregnant again.
John: She’s a freeloader if ever there was one, but what the hey? Frank approved the numbers so why worry? Sixteen of us, right? Eight adults and eight kids. right?
Mary: Right, Amanda and I figured it all out, our family will need about eight rooms in all. She’s done all the allocations but left the hotel choice to you. The list is over there by the phone.
John: I better call and make those reservations. We don’t want to have any screw ups for Amanda’s big day. [ dialing]It’s only a couple minutes from the RIU where Frank and his people are staying. Apparently, RIU’s arranging the entire thing, we just have to…hello? Moko Beach, Jamaica?
Reservation desk: Yes sir, this is Moko Beach, how can we be of service to you?
John: Well, my friend stayed at your hotel last year and raved about your hotel and its service. I’ve got a group coming in for a wedding and we wanted something fairly intimate. Exactly how many rooms do you have?
Reservation desk: Well Mr. ?
John: Maudib, Mr. Maudib
Reservation desk: Yes, we have exactly eighty rooms of which….
John: Perfect, we’ll take them all. For the 15th March next year… that’s still nine months away
Reservation desk: [incredulous] All of them sir? Are you sure? That’s high season sir, our rates then are $120US per night double occupancy…
John: Don’t worry, I’m sure you’ll find my credit card can handle the deposit (covering the phone and whispering to Mary)[ especially since Frank’s paying]… look, I’m in a hurry so here’s my name, credit card number [John gives the rest of information]
Reservation desk: Ok sir, that’s all done. You’ll receive a confirmation by email. Look forward to being of service to you. (both hang up)
John: Well, that was easy, the hotel was the perfect size. Exactly EIGHT rooms. Let’s go to dinner.
NINE MONTHS LATER
The John and Mary clan arrive at the Moko Beach…
Mary: John, this looks a bit bigger than an eight room hotel.
John: It certainly does, but it does have a certain intimacy about it.
AT THE RESERVATION DESK
John: Your hotel certainly looks like it’s well equipped, for an eight room hotel.
Reservation desk (same one John spoke to 9 months before): Sir we are an EIGHTY room hotel, of which sir, 20 are actual bedrooms, 20 bathrooms, 20 sitting rooms and 20 kitchenettes.
John: So you mean, I’m booked into a 20 room hotel?
RD: Sir, We have eighty rooms of which…
John: Hello, who gives a heck about the number of bathrooms you have?!? How the hell am I going to explain to Frank.
Mary: Look on the bright side honey, the hotel could actually have had eighty rooms.
Nick and Amanda got married and lived happily ever after. John woke up one night and found the head of a dead chicken on his bed. An attached note said"if you wasn't family..." John and Mary moved to Florida far from their daughter's in-laws, where they now manage a 20 room Motel.
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