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Nver trust a cricketer....

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  • Nver trust a cricketer....

    "NEVER TRUST A CRICKETER"

    Come all ye fair young maidens and harken unto me,
    Never trust a cricketer, whoever he may be.

    Randier than a sailor who's been six months at sea,
    Never let a cricketer's hand an inch above your knee.

    First let's take the paceman, pure speed from first to last!
    My darlings do be careful; his balls are hard and fast.

    Then there's the medium pacer, his balls swing either way;
    He's really most persistent and can keep it up all day!

    And watch for the off-spinner, girls, another awkward chap.
    If you leave him half an opening, he will slip one through the gap!

    Then there's the wily 'slowy', pure cunning is his strength;
    He'll tempt you, then he'll trap you with his very subtle length.

    So ladies, do be careful, your mothers would agree.
    Never trust a cricketer, whoever he may be.

    And what about the opening bat, his struggles never cease!
    He has only one ambition, to spend all day at the crease.

    The number three is a dasher, he seldom prods and pokes.
    When he goes into action, he has a fine array of strokes..

    And do beware the slogger, not content with one or two;
    When he arrives at the crease then only six will do.

    Then there's the real stonewaller, girls, he knows what he's about;
    And if you let him settle in, it's hard to get him out!

    We come now to the last man, I hope this will not shock,
    He doesn't mind if he's last man in, as long as he gets a knock.

    So, darlings, do be careful, and be well warned by me:
    Never trust a cricketer, whoever he may be.

    And watch the wicketkeeper, girls, he's full of flair and dash;
    And if you raise your heel, he'll whip them off in a flash.

    If you take the field with the captain, you had better know the score;
    Or he'll have you in positions that you never knew before!

    The cricket commentator is a nasty sort of bloke,
    He watches all the action and describes it stroke by stroke.

    Even the kindly umpire, who looks friendly as a pup;
    You'll quickly find you've had it, when he puts his finger up!

    So, darlings, please remember and repeat it after me:
    NEVER TRUST A CRICKETER, WHOEVER HE MAY BE!!!!!

  • #2
    nver!
    Peter R

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    • #3
      Wow! Classic! Who is the author?


      BLACK LIVES MATTER

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      • #4
        Sounds Victorian

        Infidelity does not consist in believing, or in disbelieving; it consists in professing to believe what he does not believe. Thomas Paine

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        • #5
          No idea..got it in an email...but sure I could check..

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          • #6
            ..or Elizabethan?

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