Canada Will Be Closed On Monday

[Bruce]

Canada will be closed on Monday.

Canadians are committing mass suicide because the only two teams to qualify for the Stanley Cup playoffs have both been eliminated in the first round.

[Hortical]

Canada's Stanley Cup dreams sidelined

Canada's Stanley Cup dreams sidelined

Perhaps a Royal Commission. Yes, that could be the ticket.

It has been too long since we held a Royal Commission on hockey in Canada. Never, in fact. Canada has held Royal Commissions on everything from the Halifax Disorders in 1945 to Certain Activities of the RCMP, if you catch my drift, but never on hockey.

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